Father R.

Today we had Father R. as our priest. He used to be our pastor seven or eight years ago and we hadn't seen him since. He remembered me and knew my name. He said my name without asking. I told him I had seen the picture of him saying Mass on top of the cliff at the grand canyon. He gave a sermon on which he talked about EENS and salvation. He spoke of how God gives graces to all men so they have a chance to be saved (whenever this is spoken of I think of all the unbaptized babies). And he spoke about how if a man tries to be good but does not know about Jesus, Our Lord will enlighten him and send a missionary or an angel or an internal inspiration so that he can learn about Jesus and receive the faith and join the Church. This is different from what another priest talked about a few weeks ago where he denied the need to have the faith and join the Church. So Father R. believes the faith is necessary while the other priest expressed the modern view that "being nice" is enough.

He spoke about how it was years since he had last been here and how there were few of us who he recognized and I told him how some people died. The skinny old lady? D.? Yes she died. And M.? Yes, I know she died. She was very generous. But a friend who I was hoping to see was not there. I was sad. I had hoped to see him because he told me he would be at Church one Sunday in January and this was the last and he was not there. I could have spoken to him.

After Church for coffee there were four of us. We spoke for a little while. I expressed the thought that I would probably never marry and was offered encouragement. T. is the same age as me and also single and he was speaking about his troubles with women. He says he attracts the wrong kinds of women. And he also expresses disinterest in Church girls. They are stuck up or something. I don't know as I have never tried to date a Church girl. I just ignorantly hope that they are angels and that they are better than me. I am afraid of even speaking with them honestly. Less people come now that Mass is at 5 and not 2:30. But at night I get to go early and see Vespers as well as Mass and visit a few Churches. So you win and lose.

I just wanted to remember Father R. was here and he said he should be back some time in the next few months when Father S. is away. At Mass today I was praying for someone's conversion, and for me and my family. I was talking to God about them.

I read most of the life of Antony today. I will finish it tomorrow. When he speaks about faith he tells the Greek philosophers that faith comes directly from God and does not come from arguments. So that for a man with faith arguments are useless and even bad. For a man to have faith, he just knows interiorly. Faith comes from hearing, but it does not come from proofs. So his faith is different from the faith of the philosophers. I trust the faith of Antony.

Looking forward to the doctor and therapy tomorrow.